My Feed

Sun, 07 Jan 2024 13:12:43 GMT

It's interesting to note that as I look for an online copy of Call of Cthulhu to read for my Patreon (https://www.patreon.com/user?u=90631607) what comes to mind is a blog post I wrote for -- somewhere many years ago where I referenced, I think, The Dunwich Horror.

Maybe Shadow over Innsmouth? I can't even remember why, but I did and I remember clearly thinking, 'I should put a link to the story in case folks don't know it.'

So I went and found an online version and as I glanced through it, I realised it was what you might call a 'variant' text. A lot of the original Mythos stories were published in various venues at various times, in various states of editing or being edited,

and have drifted in and out of copyright or in and out of literary estates, so there are versions wandering around and this was one of them.

I don't remember what the differences were, but I noticed them and I thought, 'I should mention this in the post so people know that the variants are a thing.'

I put the link in the post and I added a sentence or two to say, 'hey, so you know, this is a version of the story where X and not Y and that's interesting if you're really in the weeds on this, but it makes no difference at all if you just want to read the story.'

And I got two comments on that post.

One was from someone who said, basically, 'hey, thanks for the post, nice job' and the other was a flamer from a dudebro about how IF I HAD JUST PUT IN THE EFFORT, I would have found the REAL version of the story on THIS website and could have linked the REAL version.

I thanked him for the link and added it to the post and received a SECOND flamer informing me that I really shouldn't BOTHER if I wasn't going to take the time to do things PROPERLY.

I let that one lie because all these comments were meant to do a couple of things. One, they were meant to gatekeep the fandom; I have no time for that on any level.

Two, they were meant to point out that he, a mighty dude, knew The One True Way and I, a mere not-dude, did not. I think about that interchange a lot because it really encapsulates dudebroism and, wherever you are, my fair dudebro, may the tentacles visit you in your sleep...

...and not in happy ways.

Mon, 30 Oct 2023 14:03:29 GMT

Some thoughts no-one asked for.

Sometime last week I saw someone -- I genuinely do not remember who -- comment in what seemed like anger and frustration that the "look for the helpers" phrase from Mr Rogers which has become increasingly popular was "a maxim for children."

It should not, they felt, be used by adults, as we (adults) were supposed to BE the helpers, not be ASKING for helpers.

This disturbed me at the time but I was having a bad day and thought maybe it was just because someone was being unkind in the general vicinity of Mr Rogers, so I let it pass because I have no desire to be That Guy On The Internet.

But it kept coming back to me all weekend and I think I finally sorted it out.

First, he was talking to children. So saying that it's "a maxim for children" in a dismissive sense is both accurate and startlingly inaccurate at the same time.

Second, and more importantly, adults don't need help? Adults shouldn't need help? Adults shouldn't ask for help? These are all incorrect statements.

And I remembered that this was the reaction I had myself when I heard the phrase for the first time outside of the show, probably sometime in the mid-2010s. I had that exact train of thought: but I AM the adult! I'm supposed to BE helping!

I don't remember the specific situation or if it was just general existential ARGH but somehow I felt I was responsible. I had to take care of it. That was my job. I was supposed to help and, by helping, solve.

And that's impossible. Literally and figuratively impossible.

It's quite likely I was having some kind of climate-related panic -- I do that not infrequently -- and how the hell am I supposed to be the adult who fixes that?

I have neither the knowledge nor the skill; at a consumer level, I do everything I'm supposed to and that is all I can do. The only additional thing I can do is look for helpers who know more than I do, who can do more than I do, and ask what they need.

Is this me helping them? Yes. Is this also them helping me? Also yes. Help is a wonderful thing in that it is very very often reciprocal without extra effort from or in either direction.

As most of you know, my wife died in January.

Had I not had helpers, had people not helped me before I asked, and had I not helped them. Help, in the best sense, in the sense I think Mr Rogers meant, is reciprocal, relationship, not palming off responsibility or effort.

Mon, 30 Oct 2023 13:00:42 GMT

Some thoughts no-one asked for.

It should not, they felt, be used by adults, as we (adults) were supposed to BE the helpers, not be ASKING for helpers.

But it kept coming back to me all weekend and I think I finally sorted it out.

First, he was talking to children. So saying that it's "a maxim for children" in a dismissive sense is both accurate and startlingly inaccurate at the same time.

Second, and more importantly, adults don't need help? Adults shouldn't need help? Adults shouldn't ask for help? These are all incorrect statements.

And that's impossible. Literally and figuratively impossible.

It's quite likely I was having some kind of climate-related panic -- I do that not infrequently -- and how the hell am I supposed to be the adult who fixes that?

Is this me helping them? Yes. Is this also them helping me? Also yes. Help is a wonderful thing in that it is very very often reciprocal without extra effort from or in either direction.

As most of you know, my wife died in January.

Mon, 30 Oct 2023 12:54:42 GMT

Some thoughts no-one asked for.

It should not, they felt, be used by adults, as we (adults) were supposed to BE the helpers, not be ASKING for helpers.

But it kept coming back to me all weekend and I think I finally sorted it out.

First, he was talking to children. So saying that it's "a maxim for children" in a dismissive sense is both accurate and startlingly inaccurate at the same time.

Second, and more importantly, adults don't need help? Adults shouldn't need help? Adults shouldn't ask for help? These are all incorrect statements.

And that's impossible. Literally and figuratively impossible.

It's quite likely I was having some kind of climate-related panic -- I do that not infrequently -- and how the hell am I supposed to be the adult who fixes that?

Is this me helping them? Yes. Is this also them helping me? Also yes. Help is a wonderful thing in that it is very very often reciprocal without extra effort from or in either direction.

As most of you know, my wife died in January.

Mon, 30 Oct 2023 12:51:22 GMT

Some thoughts no-one asked for.

It should not, they felt, be used by adults, as we (adults) were supposed to BE the helpers, not be ASKING for helpers.

But it kept coming back to me all weekend and I think I finally sorted it out.

First, he was talking to children. So saying that it's "a maxim for children" in a dismissive sense is both accurate and startlingly inaccurate at the same time.

Second, and more importantly, adults don't need help? Adults shouldn't need help? Adults shouldn't ask for help? These are all incorrect statements.

And that's impossible. Literally and figuratively impossible.

It's quite likely I was having some kind of climate-related panic -- I do that not infrequently -- and how the hell am I supposed to be the adult who fixes that?

Is this me helping them? Yes. Is this also them helping me? Also yes. Help is a wonderful thing in that it is very very often reciprocal without extra effort from or in either direction.

As most of you know, my wife died in January.

Mon, 30 Oct 2023 12:46:24 GMT

Some thoughts no-one asked for.

It should not, they felt, be used by adults, as we (adults) were supposed to BE the helpers, not be ASKING for helpers.

But it kept coming back to me all weekend and I think I finally sorted it out.

First, he was talking to children. So saying that it's "a maxim for children" in a dismissive sense is both accurate and startlingly inaccurate at the same time.

Second, and more importantly, adults don't need help? Adults shouldn't need help? Adults shouldn't ask for help? These are all incorrect statements.

And that's impossible. Literally and figuratively impossible.

It's quite likely I was having some kind of climate-related panic -- I do that not infrequently -- and how the hell am I supposed to be the adult who fixes that?

Is this me helping them? Yes. Is this also them helping me? Also yes. Help is a wonderful thing in that it is very very often reciprocal without extra effort from or in either direction.

As most of you know, my wife died in January.

Mon, 30 Oct 2023 12:45:36 GMT

Some thoughts no-one asked for.

It should not, they felt, be used by adults, as we (adults) were supposed to BE the helpers, not be ASKING for helpers.

But it kept coming back to me all weekend and I think I finally sorted it out.

First, he was talking to children. So saying that it's "a maxim for children" in a dismissive sense is both accurate and startlingly inaccurate at the same time.

Second, and more importantly, adults don't need help? Adults shouldn't need help? Adults shouldn't ask for help? These are all incorrect statements.

And that's impossible. Literally and figuratively impossible.

It's quite likely I was having some kind of climate-related panic -- I do that not infrequently -- and how the hell am I supposed to be the adult who fixes that?

Is this me helping them? Yes. Is this also them helping me? Also yes. Help is a wonderful thing in that it is very very often reciprocal without extra effort from or in either direction.

As most of you know, my wife died in January.

Mon, 30 Oct 2023 12:45:02 GMT

Some thoughts no-one asked for.

It should not, they felt, be used by adults, as we (adults) were supposed to BE the helpers, not be ASKING for helpers.

But it kept coming back to me all weekend and I think I finally sorted it out.

First, he was talking to children. So saying that it's "a maxim for children" in a dismissive sense is both accurate and startlingly inaccurate at the same time.

Second, and more importantly, adults don't need help? Adults shouldn't need help? Adults shouldn't ask for help? These are all incorrect statements.

And that's impossible. Literally and figuratively impossible.

It's quite likely I was having some kind of climate-related panic -- I do that not infrequently -- and how the hell am I supposed to be the adult who fixes that?

Is this me helping them? Yes. Is this also them helping me? Also yes. Help is a wonderful thing in that it is very very often reciprocal without extra effort from or in either direction.

As most of you know, my wife died in January.

Mon, 30 Oct 2023 12:43:56 GMT

Some thoughts no-one asked for.

It should not, they felt, be used by adults, as we (adults) were supposed to BE the helpers, not be ASKING for helpers.

But it kept coming back to me all weekend and I think I finally sorted it out.

First, he was talking to children. So saying that it's "a maxim for children" in a dismissive sense is both accurate and startlingly inaccurate at the same time.

Second, and more importantly, adults don't need help? Adults shouldn't need help? Adults shouldn't ask for help? These are all incorrect statements.

And that's impossible. Literally and figuratively impossible.

It's quite likely I was having some kind of climate-related panic -- I do that not infrequently -- and how the hell am I supposed to be the adult who fixes that?

Is this me helping them? Yes. Is this also them helping me? Also yes. Help is a wonderful thing in that it is very very often reciprocal without extra effort from or in either direction.

As most of you know, my wife died in January.

Mon, 30 Oct 2023 12:42:41 GMT

Some thoughts no-one asked for.

It should not, they felt, be used by adults, as we (adults) were supposed to BE the helpers, not be ASKING for helpers.

But it kept coming back to me all weekend and I think I finally sorted it out.

First, he was talking to children. So saying that it's "a maxim for children" in a dismissive sense is both accurate and startlingly inaccurate at the same time.

Second, and more importantly, adults don't need help? Adults shouldn't need help? Adults shouldn't ask for help? These are all incorrect statements.

And that's impossible. Literally and figuratively impossible.

It's quite likely I was having some kind of climate-related panic -- I do that not infrequently -- and how the hell am I supposed to be the adult who fixes that?

Is this me helping them? Yes. Is this also them helping me? Also yes. Help is a wonderful thing in that it is very very often reciprocal without extra effort from or in either direction.

As most of you know, my wife died in January.

Mon, 30 Oct 2023 12:41:50 GMT

Some thoughts no-one asked for.

It should not, they felt, be used by adults, as we (adults) were supposed to BE the helpers, not be ASKING for helpers.

But it kept coming back to me all weekend and I think I finally sorted it out.

First, he was talking to children. So saying that it's "a maxim for children" in a dismissive sense is both accurate and startlingly inaccurate at the same time.

Second, and more importantly, adults don't need help? Adults shouldn't need help? Adults shouldn't ask for help? These are all incorrect statements.

And that's impossible. Literally and figuratively impossible.

It's quite likely I was having some kind of climate-related panic -- I do that not infrequently -- and how the hell am I supposed to be the adult who fixes that?

Is this me helping them? Yes. Is this also them helping me? Also yes. Help is a wonderful thing in that it is very very often reciprocal without extra effort from or in either direction.

As most of you know, my wife died in January.

Mon, 30 Oct 2023 12:41:45 GMT

Some thoughts no-one asked for.

It should not, they felt, be used by adults, as we (adults) were supposed to BE the helpers, not be ASKING for helpers.

But it kept coming back to me all weekend and I think I finally sorted it out.

First, he was talking to children. So saying that it's "a maxim for children" in a dismissive sense is both accurate and startlingly inaccurate at the same time.

Second, and more importantly, adults don't need help? Adults shouldn't need help? Adults shouldn't ask for help? These are all incorrect statements.

And that's impossible. Literally and figuratively impossible.

It's quite likely I was having some kind of climate-related panic -- I do that not infrequently -- and how the hell am I supposed to be the adult who fixes that?

Is this me helping them? Yes. Is this also them helping me? Also yes. Help is a wonderful thing in that it is very very often reciprocal without extra effort from or in either direction.

As most of you know, my wife died in January.